Intrinsic/extrinsic motivation - self-awareness

They say, “you get what you focus on”.  As a young adult there are lots of pressures influencing us in one direction or another.  Here in the UK we are influenced from a very young age toward what success looks like form societies point of view.  One example of this is the strong pressure to get a job, earn and save so we can buy our own home.  I’m not saying this is bad because clearly owning your own home is a huge advantage in today’s world.  What I am saying is that the values of society are superimposed upon us.  When we are young a great many of us adopt these values long enough to satisfy our basic needs such as building security and stability in our lives via owning a home. 

We are somehow measured by the amount of “stuff” we accumulate; outsiders looking in see those with the biggest flashiest houses as successful.  Often what happens is the individual adopts the extrinsic motivators of society and subscribes to the actions that help them achieve the things that make them appear successful in society.  

Obviously achieving success for most people is not an overnight affair, therefore a substantial commitment and focus is required in order to realise the desired result.  Once the individual achieves to their own level and “ticks the box” in their own mind, telling themselves that they have achieved, then there is often a period of reflection about what to do next. 

It’s at these points in our lives that we have an opportunity to truly reflect on what it is that we are really motivated by, what our intrinsic motives and values are.  Many people make life changing decisions during these periods, surprising everyone they know by changing careers, life styles, focus and direction. 

In many instances this is because during our early years we adopted society’s extrinsic motives in order to meet certain needs that society deems to be of value only later to realise that our own intrinsic motives and what we personally value in life is not truly being fulfilled.  In a way we “wake up” to discover that what we have achieved has not made us happy. 

By recognising the truth in this story we see how important self-awareness is.  How being more aware of ourselves, what motivates us, what types of work and leisure activities really satisfy our interests can help us take a life path that gives us personal fulfilment and happiness.